We all have three basic needs when interacting with others and understanding these will help us to more effectively deal with others and improve our communication skills and communication techniques.
· Understanding another’s viewpoint, especially one that is the opposite of yours, takes empathy and listening skills. Empathy means the ability to understand another’s viewpoint so well, you could almost walk in their shoes, regardless of whether you agree with them or not.
Everyone wants to feel valued and included
The best way to build inclusiveness is to show your respect. Ask for feedback and opinions, value everything you hear and show your appreciation. Talk to and listen to everyone in the conversation. Start with the intention that everyone has something to offer.
Everyone wants to be engaging in something worthwhile and meaningful
The skill here is to find and express the meaning inherent in your conversation or message and make it relevant and accessible to your audience. You may have to communicate this meaning differently to the various people involved.
Everyone wants to be heard and understood
· One way to show empathy is to use ‘unconditional positive regard,’ where you suspend judgment and your ego needs in order to pay full attention to the other person.
· Start by communicating your intention to understand their position. “I can see you are upset. Help me understand why you are upset.” And then let them tell their story without interrupting or being defensive. As they talk, you need to communicate your understanding. “That must be so frustrating for you” or “I can see now why that would annoy you.” These responses should be genuine.
· Just because you understand someone’s viewpoint, you don’t have to agree with it or even like it. That remains your prerogative.
· Just because you understand someone’s viewpoint, you don’t have to agree with it or even like it. That remains your prerogative.
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